Nothing I can say...

I have been reflecting this morning on how to learn a little more about 'reverence'. I know that you are probably thinking that this is a bit of a srtange musing to accompany one's breakfast, but it all started when I recalled a snapshot five minutes of my time yesterday afternoon...

I went out to sit in the 'front garden', a small patch of grass with some beautiful trees and flowers out the front of our flats (surrounded by cars on busy roads - ah well!!). I wasn't feeling too great but wanted to get myself outside in the sunshine to lose some of the slightly pale 'black bags under eyes' complexion that I am gaining!

I looked up at a couple of large trees in the adjacent block of flats and had one of those moments where the wonder of the Lord's creation took me rather by surprise. I have always admired those trees, but that day they just radiated the majesty of God. It was then that my heart and brain went *pdoiiiing!* and no part of me knew how to react.

Thinking about this today, I recalled my A Level art classes and a discussion about abstract art and people going over the top with calling things 'art'. It seemed like public exploitation. A blue square for example. I could paint a blue square!! Why does this particular artist get paid millions for the privilege?? My patient teacher explained that the artist hadn't wanted to call a blue square art, rather he wanted to look at how it made you feel when you looked at it. This was the art.

Sometimes I struggle with prayer. Often in fact, as this being 'matey matey' with the creator of the universe just seems a little unbalanced. I mean, I sidle up to God in the morning and say "Hi God, how ya doing?" And before I let Him reply with "Oh well, y'know, ok, watched 50 000 people and 40 million sparrows die last night, there's about to be a tidal wave in the Caribbean, so just preparing for the aftermath of that, a big load of land caught fire in Australia a minute ago, my prayer inbox is full again (only cleared it out a mili-second ago!) but you know, nothing out of the norm!" I have already started to tell him about the person who offended me yesterday and ask that JT has a good day at work etc.

The incredible thing is that our huge God actually ENJOYS us talking to Him about such seemingly insignificant things!! However I feel that it is important to get a balance of reverence for the Lord in with the pally "Jesus is my homeboy" feel to prayer, otherwise we could appear complacent in our regard for the Lord. Thinking of my strange reaction to the tree and the concept behind the strange abstract blue square, I am learning to value the beauty of silence before God. I was reading Psalm 62 recently and it really struck me; "I wait quietly before God, for my Salvation comes through Him." I am learning that God can completely throw us when we come face to face with some kind of image of Him and that when our heart and brain react in that peculiar way, THAT is the worship and reverence that God desires, not anything we can say or do, just sheer awe. Nothing I can say can bring my Salvation, it comes from God alone. Nothing I can say can show me God. Let's listen.